Jan 10 2011
The Authentic Fairytale Wedding Experience
The Prince
First things first, a disclaimer. You may dream of having the full Disney princess experience for your wedding, but honestly, your prince probably isnt. Oh, they may be obliging and lovely and willing to indulge every one of your crazy whims, but thats a problem in itself. What fairytale prince is a pushover? Whilst they dont all lock you in their Castle accommodation until you consent to marriage (a little advice: dont go into the west wing). But a real fairytale prince slays dragons, sea hags and other witches to win you over.
Your Venue
It is imperative you go for extravagant Civil wedding venues. The first question any self-respecting fairytale bride asks is does my buttress look big in this? If there arent at least 32 buttresses on their venue, some of them flying, youre doing it wrong. Towers are important too. If the towers appear to worry too much about the laws of physics, look elsewhere. Their usefulness for imprisoning things is also to be consider.
The Dress
Theres no two ways about this one. In fact, virtually all that matters about your wedding dress is how big it is. Say, bigger than the Castle hotel. A simple question is the key to all your dress buying needs. The most important question you must ask is in the event of a fire drill, will I be able to shelter all my guests by standing on top of a pole and lashing the corners of my dress to a bunch of pegs?
The Guests
Every true fairytale princess knows she cant have a family, ok? Youll need to lose any family you may have kicking around if you want the authentic experience. Since youre marrying into royalty, you may want to consider how your upper crust in-laws are going to react to the mice you hang around with. Try to keep them apart.
Youll be doing most of the singing, so avoid alcohol for the evening. Songs that go down well at fairytale weddings typically involve you announcing your feelings to everyone in earshot. Its probably a bad idea to invite anyone you secretly dislike through a sense of obligation.
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